Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
