i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
