You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
