yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
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