Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
