Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
