Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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