call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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