It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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