I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I think your dad took our porno
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
