I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
