You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
