when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
