I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize