I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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