Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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