when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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