I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
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If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
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Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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