she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
