You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
