my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
so let's talk penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize