I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
