i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
NoShamevember. You game?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
