Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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