He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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