I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
