Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
