Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
