i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
