i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize