I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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