i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
