A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
