let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
