so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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