Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
