The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
