dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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