I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
