have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
