i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
