i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
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Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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