your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
