This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
