Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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