You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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