the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.