found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I checked into jail on foursquare
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
