im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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