You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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